Knowing What to
Look For
As with any disorder or disease, the earlier the symptoms are identified
and intervention begins, the better the long-term outcome will be.
So how do you identify the signs? Here are some things to keep in
mind:
1) If your child is not reaching developmental milestones at the
right time, such as smiling, saying first words, looking at you
and engaging with you, let your pediatrician know. If there is a
delay, this doesn’t mean your child automatically has a problem,
but it is a good idea to keep your pediatrician aware of your child’s
development. A child usually smiles at the sound of a parent’s
voice and watches faces intently at around three months of age.
At seven months, children begin responding to their own names, can
transfer an object from one hand to another and begin to engage
in social play.
2) If your child is experiencing language delays,
consider speaking only English at home for some time. Language delays
can be tricky, because more than one language is spoken in many
South Asian households. This is very important to many people, because
children who learn languages at an early age are often more comfortable
speaking them as they get older, and language also helps parents
pass down their South Asian culture. Also, children do not have
a sense of embarrassment or inhibition in learning languages as
adults might have, so it is easier for them to absorb this information.
However, being exposed to different languages can cause confusion
in a child experiencing language delays. Many parents are not educated
enough about this issue, so if a child is having trouble, he should
only be spoken to in English until he catches up and sustains language
development. At a later time, parents can discuss the issue of reintroducing
another language with a speech therapist.
If you are noticing delays, inform your pediatrician and have him
or her take a look at your child. Child psychiatrists and psychologists
familiar with these problems may spend hours of repeated evaluations
with a child to make a diagnosis. This is important because the
symptoms are less obvious than with other disorders. Large academic
hospitals might have autism specialists who may be able perform
a comprehensive evaluation at a lower cost or even for free through
research studies. It is worth looking into such options.
So, What if my Child has Autism?
If your doctor diagnoses your child with autism, get information
on what to do next and ask many questions! In the South Asian community,
doctors’ opinions are frequently taken at face value, but
this doesn’t mean you have to completely agree with an opinion.
If a doctor reassures you that everything is okay and you are not
satisfied, you always have the option to get a second opinion.
Because of stigma, South Asian parents often don’t want to
seek out mental health professionals, even though they can be valuable
resources. Moreover, noticing a child has developmental delays can
infuse an enormous amount of panic, grief, disappointment, worry
and fear in parents, and a mental health professional can help you
deal with these emotions while getting your child the appropriate
treatment. In our community, our parents had many dreams and expectations
for our future, as we naturally have for our own children, so such
problems can be extremely difficult to deal with. Ask around for
referrals and recommended professionals. Seeking help for yourself
in support groups and therapy can enable you to be a better parent.
The most important thing to understand is that
if a problem is identified, you need to act as soon as possible.
The biggest mistake I see parents making is avoiding getting the
recommended services and interventions that could greatly help their
child because of denial or hope that the problems will just go away.
Please do not do your child a disservice by avoiding what could
really help him or her, even if you are scared. You have the right
to be completely involved in overseeing what happens with your child
and assessing whether or not a specific intervention is working.
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One
Family's Journey Into the World of Autism
I am the mother of a three-year-old boy with autism. Our
son was born a healthy seven-pound baby who smiled, cooed
and hit all his milestones on target, so we never really worried
about anything. Then, at 18 months, everything changed. He
stopped responding to his name, stopped making eye contact
with us, was totally unaware of his surroundings, would spin
his toys forever and did not talk at all. Out of sheer concern,
we made an appointment with his pediatrician, who advised
us to get him evaluated, just in case, at the early intervention
centre. We can’t thank him enough for not writing us
off with a wait-and-see approach.
When the evaluation took place, we were in for a rude shock.
We learned that our son satisfied most of the criteria to
be placed on the scale for autism spectrum disorders, but
the official diagnosis came much later. After the evaluation,
he was eligible right away for speech, behavioral and occupational
therapies. Thereafter, an influx of therapists came into our
home and lives and changed everything for us. Some were very
knowledgeable, and some were clueless about what to do with
our son.
This experience sparked our quest to help
our son in the most effective way. The answers to our prayers
for our son's recovery from this torturous condition came
in the form of the applied behavior analysis/verbal behavior
approach, Defeat Autism Now! treatments and speech therapy.
Early intervention is the key to helping
these wonderful children and drawing them away from the grips
of autism. Finally, at the age of three, our son can speak
a few meaningful words for which we are so thankful.
The best lesson we have learned from this
whole experience is to never take anything
for granted in life. Also, we have learned to never compare
our child with any other child, because each child is unique.
We have come to understand that autistic children learn differently,
and it is up to the parents and therapists and teachers to
understand this and to try, in every possible way, to help
teach these children to function more effectively. The everyday
struggles are enormous, but we can never give up as parents
because we are all they have. We think of our special-needs
child as a gift, because he is indeed different and
special.
Our advice to other parents is to keep doing research and
stay as informed as possible on the latest developments for
autism treatment and management. If you cannot be your child's
advocate, then no one else will be. Nothing in the world prepared
us to deal with this grim diagnosis for our darling son, but
we survived. We are now on our way to dreaming big for his
future with stronger resolve than ever before. Isn’t
that what we, as parents, are supposed to do?
--Relentless parents of a three-year-old with autism
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