Preparing for Preschool

I am sending my three-year-old daughter, Yasmina, off to preschool for the first time this September. I have many mixed emotions about this. I am happy she will have a safe place to play and thrive and learn away from home – something all her own that her little sister, Noora, cannot get her grubby little hands all over. I am also sad that my days of being with her all day are ending – and, to be honest, I am also glad that my days of being with her all day are ending. But most importantly, I am afraid that she will begin forming life experiences and memories that have nothing to do with me, and maintaining my position as the center of her ever-growing universe will become increasingly difficult.

I believe that no one can love you as fiercely as a toddler. Sure, your child will love you throughout her life, but the spontaneous nature of toddler love, the squeezing-the-life-out-of-you hugs, the wet, sloppy kisses and the looks of complete and utter adoration will end. I am afraid that preschool will mark the beginning of a slippery slope into adulthood and before long those sloppy kisses will be replaced by little pecks on the cheek.

As ready as she might be for this milestone, there are many changes in store for Yasmina this September. The preschool I chose promotes learning in a play-based environment, but it is nothing like playing at home. I’ve been looking for ways to prepare Yasmina for what’s to come, and I want to share a few good pointers to make the transition easier for your child – and for you!

Consistently read to your child. We read a lot in my house, but I cannot seem to get through one book without at least ten interruptions. Sometimes it’s a question relevant to the story, but sometimes it comes out of left field. While reading Goodnight Moon, Yasmina might ask me why the lady at the mall today was walking with a crutch. Then, there are the position changes. She cannot stay in one spot while I read – she goes from my lap to the sofa to the floor and then back to my lap. I began to enforce some rules. I ask her to choose a comfy spot and stay there until the story is done. Also, I stop halfway through the story to ask her questions about it, so she can talk a bit before I continue on. Staying quiet for that length of time is difficult for her – the apple hasn’t fallen far from the tree – so working on these skills before preschool might help.

Photo by Cindy Pettersen Hutcheson

Bring out the artist in your child. Many children love to paint, color, draw, go crazy with glue and glitter and make a big mess. My child is not one of those children, but things are changing because I am making a more concerted effort to enjoy arts and crafts with her. She has always loved to draw and pretend to write. But now, with practice and repetition, she enjoys cutting paper with her scissors and making shapes with her play dough, tasks she will be able to practice at preschool. We haven’t quite gotten to the glue and glitter just yet, but Yasmina does not fear messy play as much as she once did. Another great way to introduce children to the joys of messes is to bring them into the kitchen with you. I make chapattis (grilled flatbread) quite often, and there was a time when Yasmina loved to watch me roll out the chapattis but refused to get flour on her hands. She now loves to stand on a chair next to me, flour the countertop, squish the dough into a ball and roll it out with a rolling pin. Eating her creations is the icing on the cake!

Practice listening skills. In preschool, children learn to listen and follow directions with more than one step. I have started giving Yasmina a series of tasks, such as taking off her shoes and putting them in the closet, going to her room and bringing me her sippy cup and picking up her clothes and putting them in the hamper. One of our favorite games to play is “I Spy,” and I have recently learned that the game is not only a lot of fun but also reinforces listening skills, problem solving skills and the concept of taking turns. Another great game that reinforces similar skills is “Simon Says.”

Plan social activities. This is especially important if your child is not in daycare. I am involved in a mother’s playgroup, and Yasmina is fortunate to have formed quite a tight social circle with children she has known since she was three months old. We get together pretty regularly, and the kids have a chance to play, take turns and share – all skills that will come in handy in preschool. If you are not involved in something like this, find ways to have your child interact with other children, either by arranging playdates with other kids his or her age or by enrolling him or her in a dance or tumbling class.

Give your child a sense of what to expect. It is normal for children to be anxious and apprehensive about going off to school for the first time. Try not to say things like, “You will have the best time ever,” “There is nothing to be afraid of” or anything else that might belittle his or her feelings. Instead, empower him or her with information. Visit the school a few times and allow your child to meet the teacher informally and play on the school’s playground. Talk to your child about what he or she will do in school, and go through what a typical day will be like. You could try role playing, pretending you are the teacher and he or she is your student. Read some books about preschool or watch some DVDs about going to preschool. A great DVD I found is the Showy Show Preschool Show, available through Amazon.com.

Come up with a goodbye ritual. This is especially important if this is the first time your child is spending time away from you and away from home. Keep it simple and brief – for example, a high-five and a “See you later, alligator!” – and repeat it at every drop off. Avoid the temptation to sneak out of the room while your child isn’t watching; instead, say goodbye matter-of-factly and confidently, and hopefully he or she will start responding in the same manner before long.

By following these tips, I am preparing Yasmina as best I can for the first day of preschool. I’m hoping she gets used to the routine and ends up loving it and that she will thrive and learn and play and meet lots of new friends. I hope that when I pick her up, she is full of excitement and stories. And yes, I hope she plants a big, wet, sloppy kiss on my cheek the moment she sees me.

Brinda Abu-Obaid is a stay-at-home mom who lives in Clifton, VA with her husband, Aladin, and her two daughters, Yasmina and Noora.